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January 31 2018

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i always know when a fic writer has never experienced a hickey

How? It’s not like you’ve experienced one either.

“[Character A] licked and nibbled [Character B]’s collarbone, leaving dark purple spots along the way.”

either they’re tossing away the meaning of “nibbled” for the advancement of smut or they have a solid misunderstanding of hickeys. it takes like four or five straight seconds of hard suction to make a spot “dark purple”.

okay so two options here:

“[Character A] licked and nibbled [Character B]’s collarbone, leaving faint pink spots along the way.”

OR (and this one is better imo)

“[character A] sucked on the skin of [character B]’s collarbone harder than a vacuum on high power, leaving behind appropriately dark purple hickeys”

“[Character A] puckered their lips and absolutely Hoover™’d the life out of [Character B]’s entire neck. ‘You DirtDevil™’ [Character B] said with a breathy sigh.”



You come to the realization that the tall metal fences surrounding the orphanage aren’t made to keep the children safe from the public, but to keep the public safe from what’s inside.

a child



today i learned that, when Jared Leto sent Margot Robbie a live rat as a part of his rude, bullshit “method acting” fo Suicide Squad, she was scared but still refused to abandon or harm the rat.

she overcame her initial fear in order to buy him a proper set up and take care of him until she found the rat a reliable owner, who… ended up being Guillermo del Toro for some reason?

so yeah that’s what happened with the Suicide Squad rat

I mean, I’D trust Guillermo del Toro with a rat.



a 500 word short story with the same plot as your novel that explores how quickly the problem could be solved by sonic the hedgehog

knuckles gamgee

November 07 2017

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bowser reacting to mario’s tux vs bowser reacting to mario’s dress

Bowser respects gender non-conforming Mario even if he WASN’T INVITED

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November 04 2017

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His Twitter name is literally “the guy” I fucking swear

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“It is said a hero is only as good as their enemies. Thus, a good story has to have a well-written villain, somebody that earns respect. After all, what is a hero without a villain to challenge them?”





So sad to hear about Donald Trump. My heart goes out to everyone affected by the tragedy this morning

oh no, what happened?

This morning his white house staff found him alive and well. So sad

I love this level of petty thinking

I love the new Hero Moira From Overwatch



character concept: two people who have been reincarnated for thousands of years and have always found eachother but instead of being in love they just fucking hate eachother

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children aren’t dumb. we knew that trophies meant nothing when everyone in the fucking class got one

Also who was giving out those fucking trophies? SPOILER ALERT IT WASN’T US. IT WAS YOU.

Who the fuck got trophies?? I got a piece of paper saying Participation on it with a cheap-ass shiny sticker in the corner!

Sometimes they were ribbons.

Sometimes they were just the gnawing awareness that you could never trust any praise an adult gave you.


When I was in 7th grade, the administration at my middle school decided to make a bunch of changes to pep rallies, including changing the spirit award to the grade that showed the most school spirit to three spirit awards SO THAT EACH GRADE COULD HAVE ONE.

We decided in about 2.5 seconds that this was fucking stupid and that it was pointless to have a school-wide spirit contest IF NO ONE WAS ACTUALLY ABLE TO WIN. Our entire grade organized ourselves and boycotted the pep rally in protest. We still went to the pep rally, but the entire 7th grade sat quietly in the bleachers and refused to cheer or otherwise participate.


They ended up giving one spirit award to the 8th grade and two spirit awards to the 6th grade. At which point, our entire grade stood up and cheered, and the principal screamed into her microphone that we needed to sit down and stop cheering.

Because we hadn’t broken any school rules, the administration realized they couldn’t punish us, and they changed back to one spirit award and got rid of the other unpopular pep rally changes. But they never forgave us. The principal saved up all of her anger for a year and a half and then called a special “promotion ceremony rehearsal” for our grade right before we graduated from middle school specifically so that she could spend an hour yelling at us about how THIS WAS NOT FOR US, THIS WAS FOR OUR PARENTS AND OUR TEACHERS AND THE ADMINISTRATION AND THE SCHOOL, AND IF WE FUCKED THE CEREMONY UP IN ANY WAY, SO HELP HER, SHE WOULD MAKE OUR LIVES A LIVING HELL. 

So, yeah, tell me again about how my generation expects trophies for participating. I dare you.

Someone somewhere has a great post about how all Millennials learned from this “everybody gets a trophy” culture foisted on us was to distrust conventional feedback methods (if everybody gets one, the system must be wrong and someone who tells me I’m good at something is probably lying). So the fact that we’re a generation filled with insecure overachievers with a well-documented lack of interest in conventional life markers is partly due to all those stupid participation trophies.

Ruined a perfectly good kid that’s what you did. Look at it. It’s got anxiety

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Visual storytelling

Pretty sure those aren’t rabbit tracks. I think this was a bird shuffling through the snow, and then it made wing impressions when it took off. If it was an eagle, or something, that got a rabbit, there would be more disturbed snow.

DEFINITELY not rabbit tracks. The tracks wouldn’t be linked since rabbits hop not walk and the tracks of the fore and hind legs are quite distinctive. This is what rabbit tracks in snow look like

No bunnies were harmed in the making of above post


If you just leave your shopping carts around the parking lot like a fucking chimpanzee instead of putting it in the corral like a human being you are going to super hell and if that doesnt exist i will pirate enough millions of copies of the passion of the christ just so god will definitely send me to normal hell so i can construct the super hell just for you you goddamn animal

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